Things, unpleasant to offensive, happen around us, no one has a complete escape from it. Things unpleasant like, someone asking for financial help, or people expecting you to walk with them, be kind and compassionate to them all the time. Things offensive like, slapping you, defaming your name, etc. Though there may be many ways to deal with it, dealing with unpleasant and offensive happenings is never easy.
While some lack even the capacity to respond to offences done against them, which in itself is regrettable and condemnable, those who respond take either of these three kinds of responses. Firstly, revenge, which is driven forward by subjective logic and rage. It causes lose of compassion, lose of objectivity, and sometimes even common sense; which can eventfully harm the one who does it. Secondly, justice, which is driven by objective logic and fair process. It follows a set of rigid rules of a social system. Thirdly, reconciliation, the scripture calls it as the justice of God’, which is driven by understanding, compassion, and generosity. Matthew 5: 20 says, “For I say unto you, if your justice shall not exceed the justice of the scribes and Pharisees, you shall not enter into the kingdom of heaven.” With understanding, compassion, and generosity you become the kingdom of God.
Mathew 5: 38-42 categorically says, “do not oppose evil with evil.” It recommends the apparently foolish and humbling response to unpleasant and offensive incidents: “do not resist an evil person. If anyone slaps you on the right cheek, turn to them the other cheek also. And if anyone wants to sue you and take your shirt, hand over your coat as well. If anyone forces you to go one mile, go with them two miles. Give to the one who asks you, and do not turn away from the one who wants to borrow from you.”
Every sort of response to unpleasant and offensive things is difficult. But, in the long revenge destroys both. Like the saying goes, “Before you embark on a journey of revenge, dig two graves” -One for your enemy, and one for yourself. The Treaty of Versailles’ (1919) punitive measures against Germany after WW I (1914-1918) sowed the seeds of WW II (1939-1944), proving that collective vengeance can backfire catastrophically. The Treaty of Versailles isolated Germany in many ways, which created resentment and instability in Germany that contributed to the rise of Nazi power and subsequent WWII. Of course it was far more complex, involving multiple factors like unresolved territorial disputes, economic instability, and ideological differences, but the approach of the allied forces was opportunist and revengeful.
Reconciliation is an act of understanding, kindness and generosity offered by the offended. It gives both the parties the possibility of re-gathering and continuing with their lives. History’s greatest leaders understood this. Nelson Mandela, after 27 years in prison, chose reconciliation over revenge, preventing South Africa from collapsing into civil war. His choice stands as a testament to the transformative power of choosing understanding and compassion over retaliation.
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